hidden feeling's

Well were do I start ? 

It’s been a few week’s since my last post and oh what a difference a few week’s make. I’ve gone from being euphoric and on top of the world to feeling absolutely worthless. I no longer want to get out of bed or even bother with simple daily task’s. Right now I honestly couldn’t care less about anything. Yes that sound’s pretty drastic but that’s the honest truth. I would happily go to sleep an not wake up right now. 

I understand that sound’s suicidal but that’s not exactly what I’m getting at, I no longer want this nonexistent lifestyle. I feel that there’s more to my existence than this, I just don’t fucking know what?? It feel’s like I didn’t want to wake up. I was having a much better time asleep. And that’s really sad. It was almost like a reverse nightmare, like when you wake up from a nightmare you’re so relieved. I woke up into a nightmare.

My life seem’s to go from extreme to another so rapidly It’s hard for me to keep up, Imagine being In relatively quiet place then out of nowhere youv’e got 30 people all demanding answer’s to thing’s youv’e no idea about. It’s kind of like that, who? what? where? when?


I simply want an easy life without all this bullshit, but as I keep getting reminded It’s the hand I was dealt. If that’s the case I fold my hand, stand up from the table an say thank’s but no thank’s, I’ve had enough of this ” game “.

If you’ve any idea where I’m coming from feel free to leave a comment as right now I seriously haven’t got a clue as to what to do next other than drive myself up the wall..    

I’m well aware there are plenty of you out there who are experiencing this as well as me, all I ask Is for you to get in touch an let me know how you deal with it. Any Idea’s, suggestion’s will be appreciated.